1. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It’s okay. Don’t panic, they open up again."
2. Swat at flies that don’t exist.
3. Tell people that you can see their aura.
4. Call out, "group hug!", then enforce it.
5. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
6. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
7. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
8. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "You’re one of THEM" and back away slowly.
9. Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
10. Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
11. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
12. Start grinning at another passenger for a while, and then announce, "I have new socks on."
Mar 152012