A bloke gets a call at work to say that his wife has just gone into labour so he needs to head to the hospital immediately. Unfortunately, on the way, he gets stuck in heavy traffic so by the time he gets there he’s missed the birth.
He stands there on the maternity ward absolutely devastated and about to cry when the midwife says to him, "Don’t worry sir, you may have missed the birth of your newborn son but you can have the honour of giving him his first ever bath."
The man is elated as he is handed his son for the very first time."Go through those doors over there sir and I’ll be with you in just a few moments". A few minutes later the midwife walks through the doors to find the man with his fingers up the baby’s nostrils, dragging him through the bath in a figure of eight."WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING??? THAT IS NOT HOW YOU BATHE A BABY!!!" Screams the midwife. . .
"It is when the water’s this f*ckin hot love"